Regrets con't.

You know what? No. I didn't get it all off my chest. At all. Lately I've been relapsing more and more into depression and it scares me. It really does, just some of the things I think.

I know I'm an awful person, I really really do. And I would do anything to take back what I've done.

Especially to that one girl. That one girl who I used to be so so close with, the girl who I'd talk to every day. One of the only people who was there for me during the height of my depression. And now she's like a stranger to me. So this blog post, is made for you. You know who you are. You love Kingdom Hearts, and Howl's Moving Castle. You introduced me to that movie..

I'm sorry. I really truly am. I know I hurt you, and even if you're not hurt anymore, it wasn't fair of me to hurt you to begin with. I should have apologized long ago too, it shouldn't have taken this long for me to do it. It shouldn't take relapsing with flashbacks of everything I've done wrong to realize what a giant jerk I've been. I thought things would be okay with distance. I really don't remember whose idea it was to stop talking. It feels like so so long ago. I bet you've pretty much forgotten me by now. I really wouldn't blame you. I'm nothing special at all. But I'll never forget you. We were so close for so long. That doesn't happen without leaving an imprint on someone's heart.

So here I am. A year or probably more later after we've stopped talking. Attempting to apologize to you. You'll never read it. You'll never know just how much I truly regret what I did to you. But I do. I'd take everything back if I were given the choice. I always say I'll never contact you again if that's what you want. But look at me now. Writing this, hoping you'll read it..That's pretty much contacting you. Looks like even now I can't keep my promises.

Do I feel any better? No..not really. This wasn't even a good vent..I'm just. Sorry. That's all I can say now. Sorry..