Loneliness

    Ever feel like you're the only person in the world? Ever feel like all your friends don't really want to talk to you? Do you feel like sometimes you don't even have any friends? Well, you're not alone, let me tell you that. I'm not going to say we all feel lonely, because I don't know everyone. There are some people who I bet don't feel lonely at all. But many of us, we feel it often. So you're not alone, when you feel alone in the world. If no one is texting you, email me with your number, and I will. It doesn't matter if I know you or not, I'll text you like you've been my best friend for years. No one should have to go through the pain of feeling lonely. I know that pain well. The feeling that no one wants you. The feeling that no one wants to be around you. Let me tell you, I have felt that way too much. So if you need a friend, I'm here.
    Ever since Sammy died (I know, I write about her a lot. You have to understand that she was my closest friend though.) I've been feeling even more lonely than usual. I thought I was going to go insane with grief and loneliness. I'd never told any of my friends about her (See, we went to elementary school together, then I moved and we got back in touch halfway through middle school cause of the internet, and I never really ended up talking about her to my other friends. She was like my secret friend that only I had out of all my friends..if that makes sense). I felt like I couldn't talk to anyone about Sammy because they wouldn't understand. I thought: "How could they understand when they didn't even know she existed. Will they even care?" I really underestimated my friends. I guess I thought that since we didn't talk everyday, we weren't especially close. I'll never forget how much they consoled me when they read my first post and they found out about Sammy. Anyway, got a bit off topic there, but anyway, I still cry myself to sleep just about every night because I miss Sammy so much. I mean, she was my closest friend. Without her it's like my very existence is missing something. I'm extremely lonely now, even when I'm happy. But I have my friends to help me, and that's all I'll ever need.
    The loneliness you feel is natural. And I'm here to help in any way possible. Loneliness is not a very happy feeling to say the least, and I know it sucks. I know exactly how it can twist your thoughts, how it can make it seem like your friends don't care. But always remember, your friends care about you, they love you. I love you. Even if I don't know you, even if we have fought in the past I still love you. I'd give up my life to keep you all happy. You all mean the world to me. Scratch that. You all are the world to me, and you don't deserve to feel lonely. I'm here. And I'm willing to listen. Whether it be 2 in the afternoon, 2 in the morning, 5 in the morning, whenever. If you need me, you can count on me.
    Loneliness is a trick to make you think you're alone. But you're not. You have your friends, and family, and me. If you don't have friends or family, you have me. I'm not saying I'm all you'll ever need, but I know some pretty amazing people, and I'm sure I can introduce you to people with similar interests. I know I'm being a bit forward, but loneliness sucks, and you don't need it in your life. So yeah, I'm here for you
    Now...I thought to end today's blog (it's a bit shorter than normal I think, but it's also pretty late) I'd talk a bit more about my quest to save the world. I've been thinking a lot about it lately, and the idea of one guy trying to save the world by himself seems pretty stupid...So I've taken a new partner. This feels really sudden for me, but I know it is the right move. I think Sammy ended up bringing me and Allie together for a reason, and this might be that reason. We're talking about writing a book together. I really like the idea, maybe a published book about saving the world will open even more people's eyes than just a couple of blogs. I've made a decision on how to start saving the world too. I want to do it one person at a time, if that makes sense. Obviously I'll do anything I can with as many people as possible, but I'm not going to leave some people hanging just because they are one person. No one life is more precious than another. So I will not ignore any one person because a group needs me.
    Anyway, this is the last thing I swear. I want you all to share this blog. Not so I get the personal satisfaction of more views or whatever. I want to make a difference in the world, and that won't happen unless this starts circulating. Think about it too, it could literally save someone's life if you get them to read some of this. Like, if (for instance) they were thinking about suicide or anything but didn't want to tell anyone they knew, I can be here for them. I'm just saying it could really help some people you care about. I'm here for any of you, I promise. And anything you send me will be strictly between you and I. Not even Allie will see unless I have your permission to show her. If you ever need anything email me at Gokin_kun@yahoo.com. Remember, you're not alone, I love you.

Live on,
Gokin